Why does one student remember every homework deadline, neatly file away their assignments, and manage their time like a pro, while another scrambles last minute, forgets what’s due, and can never seem to find anything in their backpack? Spoiler alert—it’s not about intelligence or laziness. The difference often boils down to something called executive function skills.
Executive function are the brain’s command center, responsible for helping us plan, prioritize, stay organized, and manage our emotions. Think of them like an air traffic control system for the mind. When these skills are strong, life tends to run more smoothly. When they’re not? Well, even the smallest tasks—like remembering to bring the right textbook home or starting that essay that’s been sitting on the to-do list for a week—can feel monumental.
For parents, understanding executive function is important. These skills don’t just affect academics; they shape every aspect of a young person’s life, from how they handle stress to how they solve problems and build relationships. What’s more, executive function challenges are especially common in kids and teens with ADHD, anxiety, and learning differences, meaning many parents are already navigating this without realizing it.
In this guide, we’ll break down everything you need to know about executive function skills—what they are, how they develop, and why they matter. You’ll get practical tips for recognizing where your child might be struggling, plus actionable strategies to help them strengthen these skills.
By the time you finish reading, you’ll have a roadmap for how to support your child’s growth—not just as a student, but as a capable, confident young adult.
So, whether you’re here because your teen’s backpack is a black hole of crumpled papers, or you want to help your college-bound kid get better at managing their schedule, you’re in the right place.
Let’s dive in.
What Are Executive Function Skills?
At their core, executive function skills are the mental processes that help us manage life’s many moving parts. These skills allow us to set goals, make plans, and follow through—even when distractions pop up or things don’t go according to plan.
For high school and college students, strong executive function skills are the secret sauce behind staying on top of assignments, meeting deadlines, and managing increasing independence. They help teens juggle multiple classes, social commitments, extracurriculars, and, for some, part-time jobs.
When executive functioning is well-developed, a student might:
- Break a big project into manageable steps without panicking.
- Track long-term deadlines and pace themselves to avoid all-nighters.
- Manage emotions when plans change or stress levels rise.
But when executive function skills are weak, everyday life can feel overwhelming. Struggles often show up as:
- Procrastination and trouble getting started on tasks.
- Losing track of time and running late.
- Constantly misplacing important items like notebooks, keys, or even laptops.
- Emotional meltdowns when things don’t go as expected.
If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. These challenges are common for teens and young adults—especially those with ADHD or other learning differences. (In fact, difficulty with executive functioning is a core part of what makes ADHD so tricky to manage.) Want a deeper look into the brain? Check out this article: ADHD and the Brain
Why Executive Function Skills Matter
In high school, students with strong executive function skills can handle increasing academic demands, plan for the future, and begin taking ownership of their responsibilities. By the time they reach college, these skills become vital for managing life away from home—balancing classes, keeping track of finances, managing health, and dealing with the unexpected.
Without these skills, even highly intelligent, capable students can find themselves spiraling. They may fall behind in classes, withdraw socially, or struggle with stress and anxiety because they’re constantly playing catch-up.
But here’s the good news: Executive function skills aren’t something you’re just born with (or without). They can be strengthened. With the right strategies, routines, and support systems, students can learn to build these skills, take control of their schedules, and reduce the chaos in their lives.
In the next section, we’ll break down the 10 core executive function skills and explain what they look like in action—both when they’re working well and when they’re not.
Planning and Prioritization
Planning and prioritization are important executive function skills that help students figure out what needs to be done and in what order. These skills are essential for managing the increasing complexity of schoolwork, extracurriculars, and personal responsibilities in high school and college.
Planning means creating a roadmap to achieve a goal, while prioritization involves deciding what matters most and focusing energy on those tasks first. When students struggle with these skills, they often feel overwhelmed and unsure of how to begin. Tasks pile up, deadlines are missed, and procrastination becomes a way of life.
What Planning and Prioritization Look Like:
- When it’s working well: A student breaks down a multi-step research project into smaller tasks, schedules them over a few weeks, and tackles each piece one at a time. They know when to focus on their essay and when it’s time to study for a math quiz.
- When it’s not: They spend hours organizing their notes but forget to actually study. Or they jump from task to task without finishing anything, unsure what to focus on first.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Difficulty breaking large assignments into smaller, manageable steps
- Trouble deciding which tasks are most important
- Feeling stuck and unable to get started on big projects
- Constantly shifting priorities or jumping between tasks without finishing any
Tips for Support:
- Teach backward planning: Help your student start with the deadline and work backward, identifying milestones along the way. For example, if a project is due in two weeks, ask, “What will you need to finish one week from now?”
- Use visual planning tools: Encourage your child to use tools like checklists, planners, or digital apps like Trello or My Study Life to organize tasks and track progress.
- Prioritize together: Sit down with your student to list tasks for the week and sort them into categories: must-do, should-do, and could-do. This helps clarify what truly needs attention.
- Break tasks into smaller steps: For example, instead of writing “Complete research paper” on a to-do list, break it into steps: (1) Choose a topic (2) Find three sources (3) Create an outline.
- Model prioritization: Talk out loud when planning your own tasks. Say things like, “I need to send these emails before lunch because they’re urgent, but I’ll save the less important ones for later.”
Organization
Organization is about more than keeping a tidy workspace. It’s the ability to create systems for managing physical materials, digital information, and thoughts. For high school and college students, strong organizational skills mean being able to track assignments, manage deadlines, and easily find what they need—whether it’s a chemistry notebook or the syllabus for their history class.
When these skills are well-developed, students can keep up with the fast pace of academic life. But when organization is a struggle, simple tasks become exhausting. Papers get lost, emails go unanswered, and digital files pile up in chaotic folders (or no folders at all).
What Organization Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student keeps their assignments and study materials sorted by subject in labeled folders, both physical and digital. Their planner is up to date, and they rarely lose track of what’s due.
- When it’s not: They forget important papers at home, miss due dates because they didn’t notice an assignment on the syllabus, or can’t find their notes before a big test.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Messy or disorganized workspaces, backpacks, or digital devices
- Frequently misplacing materials like notebooks, laptops, or chargers
- Overwhelmed by managing multiple classes and assignments
- Difficulty creating or following a system for keeping track of information
Tips for Support:
- Start with a clean slate: Help your student declutter their workspace, backpack, or digital files. Clear spaces make it easier to maintain order.
- Create a “home” for everything: Teach your child to assign a specific spot for school materials, chargers, and even digital files. For example, “All history notes go in this folder.”
- Color-code or label materials: Use color-coded folders, binders, or digital tags to differentiate subjects or categories.
- Introduce weekly organization check-ins: Set a time each week for your student to review their materials and organize for the upcoming week.
- Recommend digital tools: Apps like Evernote, Google Keep, and OneNote can help manage notes and keep everything in one place.
Time Management
Time management is one of those skills that sounds simple—just use your time wisely, right? But for many high school and college students, it’s anything but. It’s not just about being on time for class or remembering deadlines; it’s about estimating how long things will take, knowing when to focus, and pacing yourself to avoid last-minute chaos.
For students who struggle with time management, life often feels like a constant game of catch-up. They misjudge how long an assignment will take, procrastinate until the pressure kicks in, and then race against the clock, leaving a trail of half-finished projects and late-night panic sessions.
What Time Management Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student knows it will take two hours to prep for a history test and blocks that time on their calendar. They start early, pace themselves, and wrap up with time to spare.
- When it’s not: They convince themselves they can write a five-page essay in an hour (spoiler: they can’t). By midnight, they’re still staring at a blank Google Doc, trying to figure out how it all went wrong.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Always feeling rushed or running late
- Frequently missing deadlines or turning things in at the last minute
- Underestimating how long tasks will take—or overcommitting and burning out
Procrastinating until stress forces them to act
Tips for Support:
- Use time blocking: Help your student break their day into chunks and assign specific tasks to each block of time. Encourage them to include breaks—because nobody works well for five hours straight.
- Teach the two-minute rule: If a task will take less than two minutes (like replying to an email or reviewing class notes), do it now. It clears mental clutter and keeps things moving.
- Create “reverse” to-do lists: Have your student write down everything they’ve already accomplished that day. Sometimes, seeing progress can boost motivation.
- Set visible deadlines: Encourage your child to set earlier “personal deadlines” before the actual due date. Using a big wall calendar or digital reminders can help keep these deadlines front and center.
Recommend digital tools:
Task Initiation
Ever heard your teen say, “I’ll start that later”… only for “later” to turn into 11:30 p.m. with zero progress? That’s task initiation—or rather, the lack of it. Task initiation is the ability to just start a task. Not when the pressure is unbearable, not after scrolling TikTok for an hour, but in a timely, intentional way.
For students, starting a task is often the hardest part. Even when they know exactly what they need to do, they hit a mental wall. This isn’t about laziness—it’s about executive functioning. Without strong task initiation skills, even simple tasks can feel overwhelming.
What Task Initiation Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student has a 10-page reading assignment. They open their book, start reading right away, and finish it before dinner.
- When it’s not: They plan to start reading “soon,” but soon turns into endless distractions. Suddenly, it’s bedtime, and the book is still closed.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Putting off assignments until the last possible second
- Spending more time planning or thinking about a task than actually doing it
- Frequently saying, “I’ll do it later” or “I just don’t know where to start”
- Feeling overwhelmed by even small tasks like answering an email or organizing notes
Tips for Support:
- Use the five-minute rule: Tell your teen to work on the task for just five minutes. Once they get started, they’ll often keep going. The hardest part is taking that first step.
- Break tasks into tiny steps: “Write essay” is intimidating. “Write the first sentence” feels doable. Encourage your child to focus on the smallest possible action to get the ball rolling.
- Create a designated work space: Sometimes the hardest part of starting is just getting in the right mindset. Having a clutter-free spot for studying can help trigger that mental shift.
- Remove distractions: Use apps like Freedom or StayFocusd to block social media while they work. A digital detox—even just for 30 minutes—can be a game-changer.
- Celebrate small starts: Praise effort over perfection. If your teen spends five minutes on that research paper, acknowledge the progress. Momentum builds from small wins.
Working Memory
Working memory is like your brain’s Post-it note. It holds bits of information just long enough to use them—whether it’s remembering the steps of a math problem, following multi-step directions, or keeping track of what your teacher just said while taking notes.
For high school and college students, strong working memory is crucial. It helps them stay engaged in class, organize thoughts while writing an essay, and recall instructions without constantly checking back. When working memory is weak, everything feels like a mental juggling act—except the balls keep dropping.
What Working Memory Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student listens to a set of multi-step instructions, remembers all the steps, and completes the task without needing a reminder.
- When it’s not: They forget what the teacher said halfway through writing it down or lose track of steps while solving a math problem.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Losing focus halfway through tasks because they can’t hold all the necessary information in their head
- Needing instructions repeated multiple times
- Trouble remembering details from a reading passage or lecture
- Mixing up steps in multi-step problems or processes
Tips for Support:
- Write it down: Encourage your teen to take notes—even for simple instructions. Sticky notes, whiteboards, or digital notes can make a huge difference.
- Chunk information: Break large tasks into smaller parts, so there’s less for their brain to hold at once. For example, instead of saying, “Clean your whole room,” start with, “Pick up the clothes from the floor.”
- Repeat and rehearse: Repetition helps strengthen working memory. Have your child repeat back instructions or talk through the steps before starting a task.
- Use visual aids: Timelines, graphic organizers, and checklists give visual structure and help offload some of the mental work.
Self-Control (Inhibition)
Self-control, or inhibition, is the ability to pause and think before acting. It helps students resist impulses, ignore distractions, and stay focused on what matters. For high school and college students, this skill is essential in everything from staying off social media during class to managing emotions during stressful situations.
Without strong self-control, students may blurt out comments at the wrong time, abandon tasks in favor of something more interesting, or lash out when frustrated. This isn’t about willpower; it’s about having the brain tools to regulate behavior and reactions.
What Self-Control Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student is tempted to check Instagram during class but decides to wait until after the lecture.
- When it’s not: They open their phone to “just check one thing” and get sucked into a 30-minute scroll session, missing everything the teacher said.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Interrupting conversations or speaking out of turn
- Acting without thinking about the consequences
- Difficulty staying on task when distractions are present
- Overreacting to minor frustrations
Tips for Support:
- Use visual or verbal cues: Agree on a simple signal (like a tap on the desk) to remind your child to refocus without calling them out.
- Teach “stop and breathe”: Help them practice pausing and taking a deep breath when they feel the urge to act impulsively.
- Set clear boundaries for distractions: Use apps like Forest to lock their phone during study sessions or designate tech-free times.
- Model self-control: Share your strategies for staying calm or focused, like counting to 10 when frustrated or creating reminders to stay on task.
Emotional Regulation
Emotional regulation is the ability to manage feelings in a healthy, productive way. For teens and college students, this skill is key when dealing with academic stress, social pressures, and life’s ups and downs. Strong emotional regulation doesn’t mean never feeling upset—it means learning how to process emotions without becoming overwhelmed.
What Emotional Regulation Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student receives a disappointing grade but calmly reflects on how to improve.
- When it’s not: They shut down, lash out at a friend, or spiral into negative self-talk.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Frequent emotional outbursts or mood swings
- Difficulty recovering from disappointment or frustration
- Avoiding challenging tasks because they feel emotionally overwhelming
Tips for Support:
- Name the feeling: Help your child identify and label their emotions. (“I’m frustrated” or “I’m disappointed.”) Naming emotions can reduce their intensity.
- Teach calming strategies: Deep breathing, mindfulness apps like Calm, and physical activity can help regulate emotions.
- Encourage reflection: Once they’re calm, help them reflect on what triggered the emotion and how they can respond differently next time.
Flexibility
Flexibility is the ability to adapt when things don’t go as planned. For teens and young adults, life is full of surprises—unexpected schedule changes, group project disasters, or a curveball question on an exam. Students with strong flexibility can pivot quickly, while those who struggle may get stuck or overwhelmed.
What Flexibility Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student adjusts their study schedule when they find out a test has been moved to an earlier date.
- When it’s not: They freeze or panic, unable to figure out what to do next when plans change.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Difficulty transitioning between activities or ideas
- Melting down when things don’t go as expected
- Trouble thinking of alternative solutions when faced with a problem
Tips for Support:
- Role-play unexpected situations: Practice “what if” scenarios to help your child learn how to adjust.
- Emphasize problem-solving: Encourage them to brainstorm multiple solutions to a problem, even if the first one doesn’t work.
- Model flexibility: Share how you adapt when things don’t go as planned—like adjusting your evening routine when a work meeting runs late.
Goal-Directed Persistence
Goal-directed persistence is the ability to set a goal and stick with it, even when obstacles arise. It’s what keeps students motivated through long-term projects, tough classes, or personal challenges.
What Goal-Directed Persistence Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: A student creates a plan to improve their grades and sticks with it, even when progress is slow.
- When it’s not: They abandon goals as soon as things get difficult or switch focus constantly without completing anything.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Giving up on long-term projects or goals
- Lack of follow-through on commitments
- Trouble staying motivated when results aren’t immediate
Tips for Support:
- Set short-term goals: Break big goals into smaller milestones and celebrate each win along the way.
- Track progress visually: Use charts or graphs to show how far they’ve come. Seeing progress is a powerful motivator.
- Focus on the “why”: Help your teen connect their goal to something meaningful. (“Improving your study habits will help you get into the college you want.”)
Metacognition
Metacognition is the ability to think about your own thinking. It’s self-awareness in action—reflecting on what’s working, what isn’t, and how to adjust. This skill helps students become independent learners who can recognize their strengths and areas for growth.
What Metacognition Looks Like:
- When it’s working well: After a tough test, a student reviews what went wrong and changes their study strategy for the next one.
- When it’s not: They keep making the same mistakes without recognizing why or how to improve.
Common Signs of Struggles:
- Difficulty identifying what they need to do differently
- Blaming outside factors for failures instead of reflecting on their own approach
- Trouble monitoring progress or adjusting plans when things aren’t working
Tips for Support:
- Ask reflective questions: “What worked well for you? What could you do differently next time?”
- Encourage self-checks: Teach your child to pause and assess their progress halfway through a task.
- Model self-reflection: Share how you reflect on your own experiences and adjust your approach when needed.
Executive Function Skills: Final Thoughts
Executive function skills are the foundation for success in school and life. For high school and college students, these skills help manage the growing demands of academics, social life, and independence. While some students naturally develop strong executive functioning, others need extra support—and that’s okay.
The good news is that executive function skills can be improved at any age. With structure, strategies, and the right support, your child can build these skills and gain the confidence they need to thrive.
Want to dive deeper into supporting your student? Check out resources like CHADD.org and Understood.org, or talk to a professional about executive function coaching or accommodations at school.
The journey toward stronger executive functioning isn’t a sprint—it’s a marathon. But with patience and persistence, your child can get there, one step at a time.
FREE EXECUTIVE FUNCTIONING SKILLS RESOURCES
The Executive Function 101 eBook -The Executive Function 101 eBook by Children’s Health Council explains key executive function skills like organization, time management, and emotional regulation. It offers practical strategies for parents and educators to support students, particularly those with ADHD or learning challenges.
Download it here: Executive Function 101 eBook.
